Firstly, I am a relief teacher, so I never know when I will be working. Sometimes I get a call days ahead, other times on the morning if someone calls in sick. It makes it really difficult to plan anything. So, I' not sure how long it will take for work to kick in again. Could be tomorrow, could be next week, maybe not for a month or more. The uncertainty if it all makes it difficult to get motivated to start anything too big. Maybe I'm just being lazy and that's just an excuse. Not sure I can tell the difference anymore.
During the holidays we spent time with families that we are getting to know and have a connection with. They were families we know as a couple which is fantastic, but don't really feel that I have a depth of friendship with any "girl" in particular yet. Not someone that I can catch up for coffee with, someone I could ring for just a chat without having to have a specific reason. So, now that life has moved back into school routines for most, I'm home alone. Not that I really mind. There is plenty to do, but I think there are so many little things that I have become mentally bogged down and can't get started. Of course, I can ring my sister or SIL for coffee if I get really desperate for social contact. I've moved enough times to know that developing close friendships that go beyond the superficial level take time. In fact, I think it is at least two years before you start to feel really comfortable with someone. Therefore, I am one year down, at least one year to go before I develop those friendships here.
So, that is the second reason I am struggling with routine in a round about way. I realised today that until work picks up, I'm going to be at home everyday, with the only social contact being a trip to the store. Therefore, I have to self motivate and get something done. I thought about the list of little jobs that need doing and despite the unbelievable total lack of motivation, decided to clean out the pantry. It had just become a bit disorganised. I really can't function with disorganisation, but I'm not really very good at getting myself organised.
Okay, so I have a fairly decent sized walk in pantry. Some of the shelves are deep and that is where I struggle. Things in front of things. What things should go at the front? Don't want things at the back that you need to access often as you have to unload everything to get to them. How to make this work in one of my issues.
BEFORE- Not really bad, just bit messy. So I set about rearranging, wiping down shelves and trying to put things into some sort of logical order.
AFTER- I feel like things are a bit more organised, but really, have I achieved anything?? I don't necessarily need a pretty pantry (although that would be lovely), just organised. To me, I just looks 'rearranged'. Groan... not good at this at all! I think the only thing I achieved was realising how empty some sections are! Must be time to go shopping. Just another thing to add to my list.
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